That can make things easier when you go on trips, have to deal with schools, and even when you're just interacting with other parents. I’d already spent four years correcting my kid’s name and there was no way I was going to keep that up for the next 15 years while he worked his way through the school system. Take your spouse’s last name or move your last name to use as your middle name and add your spouse’s name.Â. It took us a couple of years to feel comfortable being so unconventional, but like most things related to parenting, confidence takes time. We spent months debating what our kids’ new, single last name would be. If your children are using your new name, check-in with their school teachers, dentist and doctor's offices, etc. Explaining the change to my sons was also easy: one was still a baby and wouldn’t know himself by any other name, while the other, who was four, was satisfied when we let him know that sometimes a kid’s last name changed when they were four and, when it happened, their parents bought them a really cool new toy truck. In Victorian times, the hyphenated, or what is also called the double-barreled surname, became more popular and gradually the practice has moved from upper-crust Brits to anyone. to make sure everyone has the names correctly noted in their files. i dropped my middle name and made my middle name my maiden name (if that makes sense). For questions regarding your new last name, make sure to inquire with airlines and cruise ships, the marriage bureau, TSA, and U.S. Immigration before you depart. it worked out because the problem with hyphenating is that since it is your legal last name, you HAVE to sign it hyphenated. Deciding to keep or change your last name—and the time to think about your surname is well before the ceremony. Explaining the change to others was more of a challenge—we definitely ruffled some feathers. It becomes a legal document after the marriage when the officiant files it. Parents invented over 1,000 new baby names in 2017. We didn’t hyphenate, my wife kept her last name. If you're debating whether or not to hyphenate your last name, considering these pros and cons may help: If you decide that hyphenating your last name is the right choice for you, here are some tips to be aware of: Some states require you to write your new hyphenated name on your marriage license application. We made calls, corrected and spent far too much time explaining not only that our kids really did have two last names, but why we’d chosen to name them something so inconvenient for everyone else. Women today can opt for hyphenating last name after marriage and other easy-to-implement name change processes. Ideally I could get some advice and hear stories on here from people who can give good reasoning as to why hyphenating a child's last name is not a good idea, but I'm really open for any discussion on the topic. Pros of Keeping Your Last Name: It keeps your professional identity consistent In the age of the Internet, a lot of our accomplishments and our digital footprint make up who we are, and unfortunately, it can be a little tricky to track that after a name change. Another potential con is when it comes to your children. it will be hyphenated at the least. We had family members who weren’t happy that their last name wouldn’t be carried on to the next generation, while others thought it was just plain weird to make up something new. Some people ignore hyphens. Pros: The hyphenated surname lets you share your family name with your spouse and is a popular option for couples who want their children to have both last names. Hyphenation helps you stay connected to your children whose names might not be hyphenated and who have been given your husband’s surname. About 20% of women married in recent years kept their maiden name, and another 10% compromised with a blended or hyphenated surname. Again, my only concern with hyphenating is whether or not the names sound okay together and won't be too much of a mouthful. A hyphenated last name is when you and your spouse combine both of your last names with a hyphen. Instead of hyphenating our last names, we decided to use one last name as a middle name (i.e. But finally we settled on squishing together the first half of my last name and the second half of my husband’s last name. - Page 3: my boyfriend and i arent married. Thanks! Why my two children have different last namesThe new name felt both fresh and grounded in their history. When our 20-week ultrasound confirmed we were having a boy, we settled on our son’s moniker. The only decision is which surname sounds better before the hyphen and which should come after. By Julia Pelly Hyphenate your name, or both of you can hyphenate your names. We wanted something unique but not weird, something that rolled off our tongues easily. Pros and Cons of Hyphenating Name After Marriage. February 14, 2019. it gets exhausting after a while. She completed Design House Prep School's Wedding Etiquette study and has seven years of experience as a wedding stationer. I still didn’t want to give them just one of our last names, but the unconventional idea of making up a new name suddenly didn’t seem so weird. Now, when people realize my kids have a different last name than my husband and I, the most frequent question we get is “What will your sons do when they get married and have kids?” To that I respond, “We trust they’ll figure it out, at least by the second try, just like we did.”, Read more: What are the pros and cons of hyphenated names? Another issue in many cases is deciding what the last name is going to be for the minor child. How to Change Your Name After Your Wedding. Pros: The cons of not changing your name could be confusion with any children's last names and hassle with hyphenated names, etc. However, there are some drawbacks to hyphenating. From our initial conversation, we knew we didn’t want him to only have one of our names. This option is growing ever-popular, and it might be the least complicated. How Do We Monogram Initials for Our Wedding? So one child has … In most states, the cost isn't more than a few hundred dollars, but that amount could be prohibitive for some people. but even once/if we do get married, i will not give up my last name. A common name makes you more easily recognizable as one family. Photo: istock . When I brought this up to my husband, he agreed without a moment’s hesitation. Having one family name can band a family together. This is also called a double surname. If you want to change your child's surname, there are some circumstances when a name change [1] petition will be approved without the consent of both parents:. Parents invented over 1,000 new baby names in 2017. Those numbers are on the rise, which isn’t surprising considering the history of women’s rights. You can do some of the changes before the wedding, but many require a certified copy of your recorded marriage license which you’ll only have after the wedding. I changed my name for the sake of my kids—and I regret it A Last Name as a First or Middle Name In modern-day America and much of the English-speaking western world, the choice to hyphenate has less to do with the bourgeoise as it is a declaration of equality.Â, "Hyphenating your last name may also be a sentimental choice," says Freeman. To help you determine if it’s truly the right choice for you, here’s a list of pros and cons of hyphenating your name after marriage. , but that seemed too unconventional an essential part of wedding planning, from picking your flowers finalizing. Having one family name can help create a new name felt both fresh and grounded in their history about. Stress over what you should do, few ( if that makes sense ) grandchildren on my husband he... Today can opt for hyphenating last name, check-in with their school teachers, and. Him to only have one of our names change processes most states, the and! 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